26 Sept 2016

Clarity

For the first time in months I am seeing everything clearly. It's like I've had an epiphany and I'm noticing everything at once. I've been drifting through this year in full belief that I was fine, that I was alright and that I didn't need my meds - I was so wrong, I feel like I am a part of the world again and that I can take it and anything anyone would like to throw my way. For the first time in months I feel strong again.

I started feeling this way on saturday, I was able to understand what I was being told without over thinking and believing that everyone was out to get me. I can now disagree with people without the need to defend my beliefs and show you why I must be right. I honestly feel as if a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders - and even though I am only a few days into my meds, I can feel them working already - I am not numb, I am not on autopilot, I love fully and understand deeply and I feel okay again.

This post is mainly for the non-believers, for those people who disagree with the path I have chosen to follow and those who misunderstand my reasoning behind my meds. I have a disease, an illness (I am depressive) but with the use of my medication I can be that person who people know and love - without it, I become a horrible person. I will continue to monitor myself of course as this is only my initial
positive reaction but thus far I feel like I can breathe again, I am okay and I will ensure I remain okay.